Some thoughts have been brewing in me, trying hard to take form in my Gut, tangled threads of my ways of thinking that are trying hard to weave themselves into a coherent Birth.
I am trying hard to attend to these thoughts and allow their shape, bring them out into the light so I can take a good look at them. I thought maybe I would share them with you.
In 1978 I went to work in an inpatient psychiatric hospital, as a nurse. An LPN. I have worked inpatient since. I think that's 34 years. This includes 8 years of inpatient and residential adolescent sexual offender work, and sexually reactive pediatric work, and about 24 years of adolescent inpatient psychiatry. I now work with adults and geriatric patients. My 34th Year.
I am acquainted with suffering. Not from the external pain of an injury to the flesh, but one I believe that is maybe born of how we think and what we do with our wrong thoughts. I include myself in this, a human being with irrational thoughts and actions myself.
There is much written about how to dispute irrational thinking, and the development of tools for the alleviation of this kind of suffering. The Suffering of the mind full of Wrong Thinking.
I would not attempt to provide my Good readers with a dissertation on the teaching of the Buddha, or Albert Ellis.
Working in psychiatry has changed my way of thinking. it has become part of the fabric of my mind, and in a world where instant gratification rules and folks try to manage their wrong thoughts with anxioletics and antidepressants, I try my best to teach some of the principles of disputing irrational thoughts to my patients. Mostly without success. That is another story.
So why am I thinking and writing about all this?
Well, I have recently been a victim of my own wrong thinking, and have created alot of suffering for myself, because of my own wrong assumptions and actions. I thought someone was suffering, and I could Help. and that was NOT MY JOB.
The other day I was updating Facebook and reading some of the entries of Folks there. The subject of "copying" came up, and I read what the writer had written, interested in what at the time seemed to be the THING that was creating Suffering in another peer. The actions of another (or many others) of Stealing her ideas, patterns and work had created alot of Rage in this individual. Now, I have admired her work, and could see that she is a Brilliant designer, as in fact I believe some of her Peers to be. She has had much success and notoriety, and I believe (my Belief again) that she is one of the great designers of our time.
At that moment, I felt that I would like to join her in her outrage, and made an initial remark that extended my empathy for her situation....my ego of course propelling me to "Run with the Big Dogs" and join the group. Nothing wrong with that right? I, of course, forgot that to join someone in their righteous indignation is an Unholy alliance, But I DID Because I Thought...here is my chance to JOIN the group! ( MY need)
As I began to think about the situation and her suffering (again my perception), I remarked that perhaps she would have less suffering if she remembered to be grateful for the Great GIFT she had been given in the Form of Creativity and original thought. I also stated that I did not wish to diminish the Act of Stealing, but that she could suffer less from this act if she remembered Her Great Gift...
WOW, those remarks set of a firestorm of rage leveled at Me...
I had stated that I had never had my ideas ripped off, but felt I could understand her suffering. Suffering is Suffering Right? I guess not. I guess no one has really suffered unless they have had their patterns and ideas ripped off by some loser in the Market Place, some parasite who cruises the Internet looking for a chance to steal someones' ideas, and duplicate them for themselves.
I think that's a BAD thing to do, I think there are ways to prevent some of that, but in this World, with the Sunshine comes the Shadow. With great Success, some one is Bound to try to Copy you. I do not agree with it, but I think it is bound to happen. My thinking about it is That Sucks Squids, But they did not STEAL your GIFT. They did not ROB you of your Source.
I repeat, They did not break into your Soul and STEAL your GIFT.
I am not sure that I think it is Terrible.
Here is what I think is terrible. Terrible. TERRIBLE. The suffering of a CHILD whose parent has tied them to a CHAIR, injected them with drugs, Sold them to their CUSTOMERS to be sodomized with ROCKS and what ever else they could find. Then trying to have mastery over that experience by doing it to others.
That was my JOB, to help try to ALLEVIATE that suffering.
On Facebook when I said the Metta for this Person whose ideas were Ripped off,
I was told that my thoughts were NOT a comfort to others, "Rainbows and Lollipops" I think one person remarked....
as I was reviewing the whole thing a thought occurred to me that I had actually been ripped off. One of my Internet Buddies stole my Idea of making Snails. Right after I posted the photo on my Blog, she started making Snails, and by GOD she has been selling them ever since... great Guns and making more money than ME...a whole LOT more. I got mad about it, and severed the Link to Her Blog and Then I guess I forgot about it...jeez, I kinda miss her.
Rage draws alot of ATTENTION. Joining in makes for an Unholy alliance. it can make a MOB mentality...and Folks say and do things that they may never say,or DO.
So, from the viewpoint of a NEWBIE, which by the way I am really not to Dollmaking and ART...
I wish you well.
May you be happy. may you be safe. May you be healthy, May you be Peaceful, may you be at ease. may you be Free from SUFFERING...